Monday, August 18, 2008

Marriage Retreat



This weekend Johnny and I went to a marriage retreat for foster parents. It was out of town and the whole weekend. We left the boys with Johnny's parents (the rents as you will hear them referred to) to be taken care of. They enjoy their time with them (both ways; they's and them's). The rents always get a good laugh at the new things Bear and Moe are able to do. What new skills have they learned. Moe hasn't learned many except that he is starting to laugh a lot more and squeal with delight more now. He is "talking" to his animals more and to Bear more smiles are delivered; no matter how many times he gets crawled over. He loves him.

Oh yeah; so, the marriage retreat. The one thing that is hot on my mind is that when you call a "time-out" (for a heated argument) you have to call "time-back-in". Most times when we are in a "discussion" that becomes heated and full of frustration then we need to (just as children) take a time-out to calm down, recollect and gain composure. But more times than not the disagreement never gets resolved due to the fact that nobody ever calls time-back-in. That allows us, once we have calmed down and had time to think, to come to the table with a clear mind frame and a better way of looking at the issue at hand. We can then discuss RATIONALLY the things that need a solution. We then need to do a speaker/listener technique we learned as well so that no one is unheard or unvalidated. Then we brainstorm over the best possible solution and come to a conclusion by weeding out the suggestions that are not going to work for both our needs. We learned a lot and had a wonderful weekend alone together. The time was well spent and very much appreciated.
I felt so pampered it was unreal. We returned to our room the first night and found a red rose and a bucket of gourmet chocolates in our room. The second night we returned to our room to find rose petals on the floor along with a candle on the bedside table. (I think the petals would have been on the bed had it been made.) Johnny and I took a nap earlier that afternoon and so the bed was not made... oops.. hahahaha. OH AND YES I TOOK A NAP FOR ALL OF YOU PAYING ATTENTION. And for those of you who don't really know me that well. I HATE naps. I go to bed late and get up bright and early and cannot sleep throughout the day. I have never been able to understand why people love them so much (secretly I kind of wish I knew how to relax more so I could learn what they are more frequently) . We won't get into that discussion though. Nother time Nother story.
Blessings to you all. If you have any questions about the marriage retreat feel free to ask. I have all kinds of material that got brought home with us as well as books. I will do my best to answer your questions.

1 comment:

Mandy said...

I am so glad you guys had a great weekend retreat! I also really like the new pic on the blog top!