Is that really you?

Can I just say we have been blowing around like a leaf in the wind lately. Only in our windstorm there is also hail and fire and debris flying around making it even more challenging to remain intact.

After posting all this we got an email from our adoption atty stating that the birth father (the same guy that has had his son removed TWICE so far) has filed an appeal. Meaning that this case is nowhere near being over now. We were hoping that his adoption would be finalized in November. But after an appeal is filed it will now take from 9 mos to 3 years to finalize Moe's adoption.

As if that wasn't enough combined with all the OTHER drama we have been facing... the battery is dead in the Sequoia AND the tire is flat on the jeep. I mean! ENOUGH ALREADY!

I have to admit I have been having a poor attitude toward my children and it has not been fair to them. I would rather just fade away most days than to face them and feel like I am failing them in every area of life.

Since J has been home it has been stressful to continue a normal routine with the boys and my household chores. Even the work that I have taken on in this time has been a challenge to get done with someone popping into my artroom every 5 minutes or so. Yes, I have tried locking the door. Yes, I have earplugs. Yes, I have talked to J telling him that it is not helping me get anything done when he is interrupting me several times in an hour. But for some reason none of it is helping. I just work better when he is NOT here for the duration of the day. Is that awful?

It's not that I don't love him. It's just easier to feel like you are free to get more things done when you don't have to think for someone else too. We have enjoyed him being home for the most part and the boys have totally taken off this past month with him having been home. They are doing so much more stuff and have been LOVING him being home.

Anyhoo... So J finally got a job with a local Roofing co. I struggled when he told me this not to feel scared. J is what we like to call ACCIDENT PRONE. He scares me just walking around much less DRIVING, and ON A STINKIN HOT ROOF! I, however, did not want to turn God down or be a snob about any sort of work he was in fact getting so I just sat silently swallowing down tears and thanked God for the opportunity for work for J.

We both never really had a huge peace about it but it didn't feel like it was against God's will either so we were torn. We just continued to pray that if it were Gods will that it would carry through. If it were not that the door would be closed.

That following Tuesday that he was supposed to start working we woke up to a terrible storm. Rain in the forecast was for a while. You cannot roof in the rain (as I believe I explained in the other post) so he could not go in. We thanked God for the closed door, b.c that was indeed what we felt it was. AS we prayed about it I asked J what he felt the "open door" was. He said "Liza"

She is a friend I meet with for playdates on Friday mornings. Last Friday after he'd gotten the job with the roofing co (he was supposed to start that following Tues) I was talking to her about it. She was telling me about two of her BILs that had businesses that would possibly be hiring if we needed.

I didn't really think anything else of it b.c they were both construction type jobs that J is not the best at.

I mentioned it to him later that Fri evening in passing and that was that.

Tues rolls around and the storm was going on. I ask him what he thinks the open door is... he says Liza.

SO I email Liza and ask her about the job possibilities. She calls me in a matter of 30 min it seems and tells me that she contacted her sister (it's her husband who has one of the businesses) and talked to her about it. She goes on to tell me it's a Roofing company, my heart sank. In all honesty, I was thinking to myself, he cannot do this type of work, HE WILL FALL OFF!

But no sooner than my pity party started blowing up balloons to invite guests over she pulled out the pins for popping and said that it would not be roofing but sales. As if she were reading the party invites already! I mean really. Lord WHY do I doubt. LIKE EVER!?!

I felt a peace. All of a sudden that unmistakable peace quieted my heart and the party was cast away. She told me that more than likely he would hire him b.c they have 2 part time employees and really need to get a full time employee also. She gave me his number for J and we went on about our day. PEACE.

Later J goes to meet with him and when he returned HOURS later (guess it was a great visit) you would have thought he just met his best friend. He could not stop talking about their "interview" and just how much he LIKED this man and his wife (she was there too, "helping" with the interview :0)). PEACE.

I felt overwhelmed with thankfulness! You see, J is not the kind of person that does well with a lot of criticism and bosses breathing down his neck. He is such a personable person and he does well with more one on one contact and training. This man owns his company and works it too. It is a family owned business and they are all about family. PEACE.

What will be happening. J will go with N (the boss) looking at houses and if it looks like there is a home that needs a new roof they will stop and discuss with the homeowner that their roof is replaceable by insurance and discuss the steps they need to take to get their roof replaced. If the customer agrees they contract a roofing co and from that job J will be making 50% profit. When he starts going out on his own he will be making 60% of the profit.

Now the thing that COULD be unnerving is that there is no pay unless he makes a sale. But even that is peaceful. There is still this overwhelming peace about it all. I know some of you understand and KNOW that peace I explain. It is amazing and sometimes makes NO sense at all whatsoever BUT it is God and I KNOW that.

We will sit here and rest in HIS PEACE knowing that HE is indeed in control and we will NOT be harmed in this season of turmoil!