Today

Okay so for those of you who follow me on Facebook you knew I had court this morning. Originally I went for Roo BUT it "just so happens" that Moe's case was reviewed before the court today also.

I have had some insight on what has been happening in his case and it has NOT been good! I knew that. I knew CPS has not been happy with his current conditions. I knew that they were wanting him to come back to us. I did. I just didn't know that it would happen today!

First of all Roo's case was very short and the mother is wanting to work plans to get him back... they usually always start out that way. She was all alone, no attorney, no friend, no hand to hold. Just her. It broke my heart. I looked at her at such a young age and thought that so could have been me back at that age. ALONE, Lost! I cried. (Ol' soft heart syndrome!). She just needs someone to take her by the hand and tell her she is loved, she has value and that she has a savior crying out for her heart! JESUS, captivate her heart! There are no visitations in play so I am unsure of what that means.

Then came Moe's case! Boy Howdy that was a different story all together! It lasted about 3 hours of back and forth this and that... UGH. EXCRUCIATING! Especially having to listen to them explain the things that Moe has been through since he left our home and how he has regressed so much.

When they were talking about him no longer talking I didn't think they were 100% truthful. And when they said he was distant and depressed I was like hmmm, maybe he is just being his bashful self.

Not in the least.

Today Moe was returned to our home.

He cannot talk. He looks straight through you... he's lost in his own little world.

I cry.

Where is my happy little Moe Baby and why is there no way I can save him from this corrupt system.

CPS wants him to be adopted by us but the judge may not see that necessary if the mom can now step it up and make a way for him.

I hate that he has to be put through so much at such a young age. YES children are resilient but they are also VERY FRAGILE... Handle with care!

This has been some of the most careless acts imposed upon his little self. I was for the dad having a chance to prove himself a fit father but when it started going downhill they should have stopped it then. NOT 4 months later!

We welcomed him back into our home and saw Bear interact with his little self. Moe was being stand off-ish and then Bear came right up to him on my lap and started laughing this ridiculous little goofy laugh and Moe cracked up laughing and they sat there for 5 minutes laughing at eachother... an overwhelming JOYFUL laugh... at NOTHING. The pure innocence of childhood that he should ALWAYS know in our home.

Tonight I sat with him, prayed with him and just held him. He was tough. He put up a fight. He then surrendered and smiled at me and dropped one part of that wall.

Our Moe Baby has been returned as a damaged package but with lots of delicate placement and all the right pieces we can get him back. I love him no matter how he comes. It will be some hard work but to see him being well taken care of ... I will take that hard work over none.

ANY DAY!

Happenings

Tomorrow we have court for Roo and oddly enough it will also be the review hearing for Moe's case and how it's been going.

As of now things have not been going accordingly. There are so many things that are up in the air with him coming and going. Nobody is sure where things stand but tomorrow I hope to hear a clear perspective on things.

As for Roo. He is WONDERFUL and absolutely ADORABLE! I am having so much fun being a new mommy again. I am taking things slow this time around. I know they grow up all too fast and I want this one to last. I hold him and cuddle him A LOT. I sometimes wear him around the house just because.

He is weighing in at 6 lbs 1oz. He is 20 in long. He was born 3 weeks preemie so he has yet to come to his "due" date. He will be 2 weeks tomorrow.

I was concerned because all he does is sleep! NOW, don't get me wrong, I KNOW newborns sleep A LOT.. BUT they also have small wake times. NOT Roo. He sleeps ALL DAY LONG and ALL NIGHT. He gets fussy at feeding time (every 3 hours) but he NEVER opens his eyes for more than a second or two and then he's got them closed again. He eats while they are closed, fusses while they are closed. WHATEVER... THEY ARE CLOSED.

I am adamant on sleep training so by 8 weeks old all our babes move to their own room and sleep through the night. So for that they have to have a wake time... even a newborn you start training them for small increments. So when they eat you need them to not sleep through their feeding. With Moe and Miley I had to run their little feet under cool water or get a wipee for their face to get them awake. Works like a charm. NOT for Roo. He will get mad and cry but his eyes never open. I start feeding him and he is crashing out again WHILE eating! LOL...

SO all that to say I was concerned something was not right. I talked to a friend of mine who has also had experience mothering premature babies and told me that when they hit their "due date" a switch flips, so to speak. They start doing the "newborn things". Hmmm makes sense! So for now we will just enjoy his tiny self and feed him in his sleep and all.

Today was a bit better though. He did have a small wake time and was cooing, some. There is progress. We laid him on his little gym mat and he was looking at some of the toys hanging overhead. That was encouraging. When you have babies that you know have been born with "issues (drugs, alcohol, meds)" it is easy to start analyzing the "delays" you see. As a foster parent we have to report these things and have assessments. NOT FUN! I was glad to get the information to know that nothing is REALLY wrong, just catching up on baking :).

I will let you know how court goes tomorrow.

And he shall be called Roo

Thanks for all the wonderful suggestions. When I read the post about the nickname Roo, it literally brought tears to my eyes (yeah I've gotten a bit sentimental). It was HIS name and I knew it.

I am working on blog friendly pictures of this little guy...so stay tuned.

We go to court Tuesday to hear his case. It will be interesting I am almost positive! Just a side note, that will also be the same day as Moe's court hearing so I will be there for both really.