Story of ME! 7

hahaha okay I am feeling the flack (Thanks Jessica). I really am doing my best to sum this all up! It has been quite the roller coaster I tell you!

L started hanging out with this guy more and more and introduced me to his wife. They were wonderful people but the "too good to be true" type. I was skeptical of it all. We started hanging around church groups with their friends more and I felt the distance growing between me and L. I hated that! I KNEW HE WOULD LEAVE!

We were on our way to "Lifegroup" (a group of church members in the same season of life, ex... college group, 20's zone, elder's zone, young families.) with our new "friends" one evening and the wife (A) turned to me and started asking me some questions about my heart and why I was so shut off to Jesus and knowing HIM. I was bitter and hard-hearted, I knew they were trying to separate us and it was working on L. I told her we could talk about anything but my father. Then she asked me some questions about him (she didn't take to hints very well) and I lost it. I broke down my walls and let God in. I accepted Christ right there in the back seat of that car! (If you are lost and have more detailed questions feel free to email me... hahaha it is a summary here.. hehehe). That night I dumped a bag of weed down the toilet, threw away my cigarettes and gave all the alcohol in the fridge to the guys next door (had I thought about it a little harder I probably would have thrown it away too...). I turned away and never looked back! I knew the downward spiral I could not escape and I was ready for this change!

July 4th 2002 L and I both got baptized in the river in the city where we lived. I felt it was so significant to be baptized on Independance day! My chains are gone... I've been set free! Thank you JESUS! I cannot tell you how ALIVE I felt that moment! We celebrated like none other that day! My mother and father even came to see the blessed event but were told of the wrong location so they met us back at our house to have bbq and homemade ice cream with us. Oh did I not tell you that my mom and dad have by this time started dating again. YEP! hahaha. I guess about when I was 23 or something... they just started talking again and the next thing you know they are in LOVE all over again but it is completely different now because they have both changed tremendously! Crazy but cool.

Now comes the part of living together that needs to be addressed. We lived in a two bedroom house... both bedrooms fully furnished so I just move into the other bedroom. He carries on with his life as though he just got rid of a girlfriend and starts hanging out with some old friends again and doing all sorts of things. My heart gets broken and I turn to God. I didn't know what that looked like but I cried a lot and talked to HIM as though He were right there. I thought it felt kind of dumb at first but the amazing peace that came as I lay there talking the more I knew how real HE was to me!

In my heart I knew this living arrangement was still not pleasing to my FATHER but I didn't know what else to do. I just knew if I moved back to where I came from and back to that life that I would surely stumble and fall. My heart was torn.

One day I was home trying to figure out what on earth I was going to do, where I would move to. I didn't have a job so I didn't have any money saved up and I didn't have a degree to get into anything that would pay me to live on my own again. Not anything honest anyway. I had been a Chiropractic assistant for about a year but I had an application in all over town and nobody was hiring. Then a girl shows up that I had met at a Lifegroup meeting one night. Just out of the blue she comes knocking on the door.

I invite her in and she starts talking to me about our living arrangement and I tell her that I am trying so hard to figure out where to go but I am afraid of where I will end up. She then explains to me that she had been talking with her family about me living with them for a short time and that they wanted me to come live with them. WHAT!!! Totally out of my comfort zone!

sorry gotta go ... boys are up from naps! I know... absolute torture! Sorry! I will be back later tonight!

story of ME! part ....uummmm, oh yeah 6 (I think)

I thought that was all I could handle of that LOVING relationship and decided to hand the ring over and say good bye. He made me keep the ring and promised to leave me alone. (I am gathering quite the jewelry store at this point.

I went back to partying and bar life. Dated some different guys off and on. Lived life stoned and drunk and "having a blast", not knowing what I was really looking for.

I was staying back and forth from all kinds of friends houses. Finally I met a guy (L) that was really into me and I was just looking for "someone to love me" so we hit it off nicely. I moved in with him at his apartment and pretty much guaranteed him that I would hurt him to push him away... it was known of me. He pretty much promised me there was nothing I could do or say that would run him off. He wasn't joking... I tried HARD to push him away... several times! He stood by me just as promised!

He had it together and was my best friend, we were perfect for each other in so many ways. We moved into a house of our own and got engaged. We were together for (maybe 2 years???) and we were living the life. I didn't have to work and drove a brand new truck. Lived basically however we wanted and still partied together.

We really enjoyed going to garage sales and one afternoon we were driving home from a friends house and we spotted a yard sale with an antique table out on the front lawn (oh yeah we also had a thing for antiques). We decided we would stop and check into it. They wanted more than we were willing to pay and they asked if we were looking for a table (in general) and we said yes. The guy there told us that he had a different table in the garage but didn't know if his brother in law was willing to sell it, if we left our phone number he would check for us and call to let us know. Sure why not!

About a week later we were at home watching a movie and the phone rings. L went into the other room to talk and after about 30 minutes comes back into the room with me and looks completely shocked. So I say "GOOD YOU'RE BACK LET'S WATCH THE MOVIE!" Hahaha joking... I looked at him with an inquisitive eye and asked "what in the world was that about?"

"That was the guy from the garage sale and he said he wants to give us the antique table!... He said he and his wife were praying about it and felt like God told them to give us the table!"

(Great now these weirdos, who "talk" to "God" have our phone number!!!) "hmmmmm.... okaaaaaay"

(we had previously been looking for a church to attend... yes living in complete sin and looking for a church to attend every Sunday!)

So that was REALLY random. L goes to pick up the table that weekend and comes home and said.... "I gave my life to the LORD!!!"

(Insert blank, dumb look here) " What in the world are you talking about???" Remember I know hardly anything about the church and what all it entails... So like was "the LORD" coming to pick him up soon or something??? They are just going to hang out and be buddies now or what??? What does that mean, "I gave my life to the LORD???! It meant that our lives would be changed from that point on!

"wOrDlEsS wEdNeSdAy...

I am the happy one in the purple sweater. That is a small portion of my fam. My sis is in the pink pants with the stylin' smurf shirt! (Okay stop laughing now...you know you all have a dorky fam pic somewhere!)

This is me at 14 ish. holding a friend's little boy. I was going through most of my pictures and in 90% I am holding someone's child. hmmmm

Me with the infamous teddy bear (16 ish). Going through the "goth" days...(Caught off guard in my apparel.)

My sister's second wedding. (17ish) NICE!

21 ish

My friend and me (all my friends were guys... 'cept C)

The days right before salvation.